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two versions? this did well on instagram but idk how twt works lmaoo

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Сначала тебя зовут в гости. Комфортят. Знакомят со своими крысиками. Смотрят с тобой фильм. А потом с тобой хотят играть по Awww. Когда познакомился с чудесным парнишей.

Я, когда нашёл охуенный фанфик по NC-17:

Почему меня так сильно переебало с на ? Реал тому виной что ли?.. Только такое объяснение найти могу пока что. Увы.

Мне это написали со словами: "Подумал, что тебе в тему будет сейчас." Это блять вашу мать Это черт побери Б О Л Ь Это мать вашу П Р Е К Р А С Н О

Я просто хочу, чтобы эта красота украшала мой твиттер. Current music: AJ Mitchell - "My Lover. My Friend".

Когда твой соигрок по ушёл спать после такого охуенного поста, что тебе хочется орать в окно нахуй Я:

Нет, ну ролка по ... Как я до такого дошёл то, блять?..

В одном из тегов по фандому на флаймере (тег если что) столкнулся с чуваком клевым. И мы обсуждаем хэдканоны. И вот шикарный у него хэдканон касаемо Майры 👍

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У Финна тут такое счастливое лицо ❤️ И Уайатт такой: м-да, конечно, сидит тут красивый, хороший и счастливый... (люблю его) Короче, вы как хотите, а я зашипперил. Стозиер ❤️

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  • Richie, whispers: person that loves me says what...
  • Eddie: What?
  • Richie: *blushes*
  • Stanley: No, seriously what?
  • Richie: Well that's interesting.

What would be hilarious is if Richie surprises Stan with concert tickets for his birthday, but the whole thing is a surprise. A typical Richie endeavor.

When Richie pulls up to the venue, Stan is intrigued, but he thinks Richie either got tickets to some boring clarinetist or Post Malone or someone. He can’t tell if Richie is intending to insult Stan’s taste in music or to troll him. 

But then they get inside and it’s a Doja Cat concert. Richie intended to troll Stan by dragging him to a loud concert of a genre Stan hates.

But then Stan starts jumping up and down, ecstatic bitch, and the bitch knows every word and is singing and rapping along (except for the n word of course), and Richie is like “No way. No fucking way. This isn’t real.” 

The troll has been trolled.

And because we know Stan has a little booty action going on, he definitely starts twerking. And yeah, he’s dressed even more formally than normal, because he thought Richie was taking him to a restaurant or some shit. But still, he drops it low and throws it back. All the kids around them are like “Work sis!” And Richie is like:


And Stan isn’t even aware that Richie intended to ruin his birthday with a concert he thought Stan would hate. He’s just riding the high of having the most fun he’s had in months. So he definitely gives Richie the best head of his life when they get home, unless he doesn’t wait until they get home 👀

when richie tozier is 7 years old, he meets stanley uris. in his best impersonation of a british butler, he tells him about how he had just fallen off the monkey bars. stan just stares at him. when richie asks if he wants to hear another voice, stan tells him he would prefer it if he just shut up, actually. they decide that they should probably be best friends.

when richie tozier is 8 years old, he meets eddie kaspbrak. stan watches as richie’s face lights up. he looks at eddie, wearing a bigger smile than should be physically possible, and then back at richie. stan understands immediately. 

when richie tozier is 13 years old, he tells stan he’s gay. stan raises his eyebrows, says, “you don’t say?’’ and asks if richie’s going to eat the last slice of pizza.

(he also tells him he loves him. and he’s proud of him. and supports him. obviously.)

when richie tozier is 17 years old, he ditches his prom date for a song and drags stan onto the dance floor. they swing each other around, stan laughing loudly while richie sings along. they don’t notice bev’s camera, and when she gets the photos developed she asks for two copies. richie keeps it in his wallet. stan frames his.

when richie tozier is 18 years old, he gets accepted to the same college as stan. when richie asks if he wants to be roommates, stan looks at him like he’s an idiot and tells him he already bought the microwave. 

when richie tozier is 21 years old, stanley uris gets engaged to patty blum. when stan asks richie to be his best man, richie throws himself at stan, crying, “i knew you loved me!” stan sighs and pats richie on the back while he crushes him.

(no, he doesn’t smile. not even a little bit.)

richie’s speech features no less than four voices, throws the five minute rule out the window, and is, at times, borderline insulting. stan rolls his eyes, laughs, shows off his best poker face, and only cries once. twice. three times. 

when richie tozier is 35 years old, he is a household name. patty puts his new comedy special on after dinner the day it comes out. stan ignores it for his favorite puzzle. he’s heard it all before, anyway, because richie calls every day to run jokes by him. stan always tells him he isn’t funny. richie always says, “tell it to my millions of fans!” stan always hangs up. when richie starts doing his british guy impression, stan looks up and smiles fondly. patty pretends she didn’t see. 

(she also pretends she doesn’t see him forget his puzzle and watch the rest. and if stan laughs at every joke, well, that’s between the two of them.)

when richie tozier is 40 years old, he finally proposes to eddie kaspbrak. richie gets down on one knee, pulls out a ring pop, and asks stan to be his best man. stan just wrinkles his nose and says, “i hate grape.”

(he eats it, though. and wears the ring for the rest of the day.)

by the end of his speech, there isn’t a dry eye in the house. stan watches in amusement as richie, who had been crying since, “good evening everyone, i’m stanley uris,” finishes eddie’s emergency package of tissues. when richie is done, he stands up. “stan the man,” he says seriously, “i love you.” for once, stan has nothing witty to say. “i love you, too, richie,” are the only words that come to mind.

(richie’s hug feels like it bruises a couple ribs. stan tells him they’re getting too old for this. richie ignores him.)

anonymous asked:

I'm all here for the kinky stenbrough/stozier! Bless us with your hcs please

I was going to be mean and say Richie has a farting kink, but okay I’ll take this seriously 

Realistically for all Stan ships, I see like at most mild bondage, maybe the tiniest most tepid little drop of D/s shit too. Like Stan would definitely like hearing Bill grunt out “Good boy,” that’s for sure. 

I don’t think Stan would call Bill daddy or some shit. Bill would bristle at being thought of as old, but I think he would be amused that Stan on some unconscious level is processing his daddy issues through Bill’s cock. Love that for him!

Here I am not taking it seriously again…

Okay, like I’ll be honest, I haven’t really thought of stenbrough or sotizer as that kinky. Definitely not into sceneplay. Maybe Stan likes his hair being pulled, maybe Richie likes feet, maybe he wants to suck on Stan’s toes, maybe Bill is into spanking, like who knows? 

Like I’ve said before, there’s no one definitive stenbrough for me, or for any of the ships. But as a baseline, I guess Stan likes when his partner is in control, that’s something I could see as applying to all versions of Stan. 

a summer day

Richie’s eyes settled on Stan, soft curls, pale features, and the loveliest pink in his cheeks. He was soft-spoken and wise and Richie adored him. Boys weren’t supposed to be pretty but Stanley just was. He was so pretty and so unaware of it, from the tips of his neatly trimmed nails to the top of his mess of sandy-blonde curls. His words were often joking but always had a hint of affection in them. Stanley was rain in june, a bird’s song, the stillness of the ocean early in the morning.

He dragged his eyes over to Beverly, the prettiest girl in the world in his four eyes . She was much more than just a pretty girl though, she was fearless, caring, and so kind it made Richie’s chest ache. Her beauty was not only skin deep, but far deeper. Her firey red hair matched her soul, and the freckles that dotted her face reminded him of the constellations they saw when they star gazed in the fall, her eyes were like diamonds and Richie prayed he’never forget them. Beverly was the warmth of fire, the feeling of the first day of summer, a butterfly in may.

Bill, their fearless leader, the boy that Richie pins as his first love. Auburn hair and scrapped knees, sticking up for his best friends to boys much older and far bigger than he. Bill was an enigma to Richie, a beautiful mix of heroic and humble. He was almost as tall as Richie now and filling out with muscle and richie could hardly breathe anymore. He played baseball so effortlessly and was the best brother to Georgie. Bill was the feeling of snow on christmas morning, the smell of freshly cut grass, the laughter between best friends.

His attention drifted to Mike, god how he loved Mikey. The boy who was once unsure of himself and how he fit into their misfit family now smiled the prettiest smiles and laughed the brightest laughter. His skin shone in the summer sun like nothing else, and his eyes were the loveliest shade of honey. His kind soul and tender touch felt like a taste of heaven on earth. Richie was positive if he’d ever met an angel it was in the form of Mike. Mike was the comfort of a hug, the taste of fresh lemonade, the feeling of tenderness.

Then came Ben, or Ben Handsome as he was so affectionately called. Though he wasn’t the pudgy kid he was a few summers ago, his heart was still as full of the same love and loyalty now. Ben had a way with words like no other, the first to help and the last to go home. Richie admired his beautiful feautures, his newly acquired height, toned muscle, and the mess of soft, dark blonde locks that fell in his eyes every once in a while. Ben was the feeling of a first kiss, a bouquet of roses, the calmness of night.

Eddie, the boy richie teased until he cried from the day they met, a mix of tender affection and the short tempered-ness much like that of a child. His long eyelashes cast shadows in the late afternoon sun, and caught rain in the spring. Eddie, though hot headed, was a sweet boy who’d give the world to make any of his friends smile. His delicate feautures, covered in freckles from the years in the sun, reminded him of home. Eddie was the sunshine after a storm, the sparklers on the fourth of july, the sweetest smile.

Richie was in love, so far gone for the six most important people in his life that it was laughable. A puppet to his emotions, Richie hoped that one day he’d finally be able to tell the deepest and darkest secret to them without them running for the hills. But today, he lays back against the grass and dozes off with Stan’s hand resting idly in his hair and Bev’s legs crossed over his.

The Big One

So… I finally gonna post the first fanfic that I ever wrote so I’m very nervous, this a How I Met Your Mother AU btw that you can find here

Words: 1.192

If you ask Richie, life was a totally awesome right now like his career as a comedian took off faster than he expected, his sex life was as perfect as ever and his shirts were still fashionable

So he didn’t understand why that dwarf decided that he was actually sad after seeing him 2 seconds when they didn’t even know each other, he knew that probably shouldn’t care what people think and, in fact, he has never done it but somehow, this time really needed an explanation

“Sad? Lil’ dude, I got 14 babes numbers in the last hour,” he exclaimed aloud to a brunette as he followed him through the drug store doors, such guy dropped his stuff in a small bag but seemed to not react. “What can I possibly be sad about?”

He was surprised when the stranger, perhaps tired of screams, decides to stop walking and turns to face him. “I think you were in love and you messed it up” Finally he replies, the expression on his face was mostly neutral but Richie could see a flash of sadness in his big brown eyes.

Understanding shakes Richie’s entire body so violently that his smile fades and wobbles back, he adjusts his glasses as a excuse to hide his face and tries to say something, but the other guy wasn’t over yet

“And every moment of your life since then has been spent trying to stay busy enough to ignore that fact”

At any other time he would’ve denied it and would continue on his way but this time he felt he could no longer run away when the cold truth he had tried to bury deep in his mind was right in front of him, ready for another round and the familiar pain in his chest made to take several deep sighs to calm down

“We tried to go out a while ago and it was a disaster” Richie begins once both boys moved to a bench in front of the drug store. “But I-I always regretted giving up” He continues to feel a great weight leaving his body, always rolls his eyes when Bev talk about her therapies but maybe he underestimated how much they can help

“Everything ended so quickly” He ends with a nostalgic, quiet laugh since after a long time he allowed himself to remember the most genuine relationship he ever had and it felt great, Lil’ dude only listened with a compressive smile without interrupting at any time

“What about you?” He simply questions his companion because it was kinda awkward for him to be the only one who talked about his feelings. “You and your boyfriend gonna go on distance?” He looked at him for a second looking surprised by the question but seemed to overcome it very quickly and decide to continue the conversation

“I don’t know,” he said naturally looking strangely vulnerable to someone who had reprimanded Richie as if he were a small child a few moments ago. “I think maybe I still haven’t the right guy” Richie thought he had imagined it before but there it was, a deep sadness blurring his eyes, there was something there, he didn’t want to investigate that though

“Hmm, I wonder if I know someone to set you up with” He drops in his place and really tries to think of someone he knows, someone desperate but nobody comes to his mind, well, it will be for the next one. “Nope, drawing a blank”

“Are you gonna to get this boy or what?” He insists with some urgency, it seemed that made sure to get Richie find love again was his new job and he took that assignment very seriously, it was creepy but also tender coming from a stranger he decided for himself

“I don’t know” Richie admits quickly, although deep down he knew he was just scared, he still clearly remembered feeling his heart break apart when he ended his relationship to be with Stan but he refused to do the same

“I’m kind of at my peek now” At times like that he remembers that shallow playboy he used to be years ago when he only worried about how many people slept every week, simpler moments where it was only one night and goodbye, with no feelings, no compromises and above all no pain “I don’t know if I can just walk away from the game” It was safer that way so maybe the best thing for his life was to ignore his heart from now on

“Do you want to keep playing or do you want to win?” The smaller one asked this time, he was slightly frowning as he looked straight into his eyes as if he was challenging, Richie got a little distracted when he first noticed the freckles galaxy on his face that made him look adorable

“I want to win” His own voice exclaimed firmly after a whole minute despite he don’t remember to have thinking, but it didn’t matter because he agreed, Stan, Stan has always been the answer and Richie knew it, he could suffer a thousand times if that meant getting back to the only person who gave meaning to his life

What am I doing? In less than 20 minutes, Stan and I could be…“

"No, no, no” Lil’ dude interrupts with an exasperated tone of voice that in Richie’s opinion doesn’t fit his angelic face, he looked at him confused as thought about that. “It’s going to take you more than 20 minutes” He starts to sound like a mother and a coach at the same time, in another situation, he would have found it hilarious

“It’s going to cost you all your time, all your attention, all your resources” At this point, it made it sound like an almost impossible challenge but Richie didn’t care at all, just knowing that what was at stake was love From Stan, he felt he could overcome anything. “This is the big one” Of course it is and besides, when he ever backed down from a good challenge?

“Can’t be messing around, picking up twinks on drug stores.” The brunette scold softly with an expression so blunt that it made Richie quickly nod. “You have work to do.” He finished with a look so deep that he could see your soul if he tried to before getting up and go down stairs to subway, leaving him alone to plan his next move

He may not know who that mysterious guy was but he knew for sure that he would always be grateful to him and with that talk they had, that talk made him realize what he really wanted in his life and gave him enough determination to go for it, Richie thought as he found a blank page and wrote with sweet smiles and blond curls stalking his mind

He decided that “The Bird” would be the perfect name for the new and, hopefully, last play he will ever make, the ghost of a proud smile curves his mouth as he looks at the paper in his hands

eclectic-disaster  asked:

hey there! a 24 nb mainly looking for some 18+ lovelies to rp the losers club ships with me. who write literate 3rd-person multi-para replies on discord. i'm pretty much open to any ship, my top ones atm are: stenbrough, stozier, stanlon, reddie, bichie, or chaotic 4 together! i do prefe to writestan, eddie, and richie (if doing bichie). willing to double. either looking for some aus (possibly fwb?) or some post ch 2 fix-it plots. message me on @j-eepersroleplayarchive if interested, please!


anonymous asked:

hey! could you do stozier for “you burn me” quote?

Here’s some Stozier, no Pennywise. All are 18

Pairings: Stozier with a side of Benverly, hanbrough and a pining Eddie. 

Warnings: Underage drinking

Send me a quote and I’ll write a fic based on the quote 

(Doing this for any IT ship, rules: here)


It is Summer before the Losers’ freshman year of college and they all want to make the most of it before they all go their separate ways. Well except for Richie and Stan who managed to get into Yale together, not to mention a dorm room. The lot of them sit in a circle on the floor of the barn at Mike’s grandpa’s farm. Sure it stinks of manure and animals but it was quiet and away from any form of civilisation (the house mainly). Mike had started a controlled fire in a vertically cut metal drum that sits on metal legs in the centre of the Losers Club’s circle.

“I just remembered that I brought over some alcohol,” Beverly states getting up from her spot on the concrete floor and moving over to the fridge where she had piled in bottles upon bottles on beer, vodka, schnapps and lemonade (for mixing purposes). 

She grabs as many beers as she could carry and passes them round to the boys. “I’ll get the vodka out later.” She says, before she passes a bottle to Eddie, she asks, “do you want me to grab the schnapps, Eddie?” 

“No no, it’s fine,” Eddie says, nobody knows of his and Richie’s late-night drinking sessions one Saturday of every month. He knows that that is going to be one of many things he’s going to miss about Richie.

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