From our FAQ: https://askanonbinary.tumblr.com/post/166408335520/askanonbinary-faq-prod-at-me-through-the-inbox-if

8. How can I tell if I’m faking it or if I’m really nonbinary?

If you’re worried you’re faking it, then you’re not faking it. People who are faking it (who have got to be such a minority that this is not really a thing) 100% know they are faking it because they are doing it on purpose. What you are feeling is self-doubt brought on by living in a cisnormative and exorsexist/transphobic society that insists you can only be one specific gender, preferably the one randomly and coercively assigned to you at birth and denies the existence of nonbinary people altogether. There is nothing wrong with exploring your gender. It can take years worth of time to really come to grips with, understand, and accept being nonbinary thanks to lack of visibility, representation, resources, accept, and support. That doesn’t make you a faker - it makes you human.

One way to think of this is that your mind is basically gaslighting you, making it harder for you to accept your gender feelings (whatever they end up pointing to), in accordance with what society has taught you must be true about (your) gender. You need to work hard on recognizing these thoughts as unhealthy and unhelpful. Realize when they come about, then specifically combat them with reminders that you are allowed to question and explore and that nonbinary is a real (and vast and diverse) and valid identity. You can also utilize the coping mechanisms found below in the question “How can I cope with dysphoria?” to help you on your path to self-acceptance.

You may also be interested in our questioning tag.

~ Mod Sock