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Changkyun: okay, but hear me out. one octopus…many octopussies

Hyungwon: how do I block you in real life?

2 notes
  • Minhyuk [drunk]: I hate horses?
  • Minhyuk: They're too tall and pretend to care about others feelings.
  • Wonho: They do care.
  • Minhyuk: THEY DON'T!
  • Wonho: They want to help you.
  • Minhyuk: THEY DON'T!
  • Minhyuk: They want to ruin me.
  • Wonho: Listen.
  • Kihyun, bitterly: Oh look at me! I'm Wonho, I have perfect bond structure, and kind eyes!
  • Wonho:
  • Kihyun: Go fuck yourself, Wonho.

Minhyuk: Hey what time is it?

Changkyun: i don’t know let me check

Changkyun: *plays saxophone loudly*

Kihyun: *from another room* WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT 2 IN THE MORNING

Changkyun: it’s 2 in the morning.

  • Changkyun: Fucking sick of people stumbling into the kitchen at 12-3AM and asking why the fuck I'm cooking.
  • Changkyun: It's called Dark Lunch you absolute troglodyte. Get with the program you fucking fool.
  • Kihyun: [Pulls door but it doesn't open]
  • Minhyuk: You gotta push it.
  • Kihyun: Really? Thanks, my next option was to lift from the bottom.

monsta x as things ive said/done

shownu: wait.. hedgehogs are real??

wonho: *cried in a target parking lot while listenkng to adele because i thought about how much i missed my best friend a little too much*

minhyuk: unfortunately yes, i am attracted to men

kihyun: my spaghetti is upsETTI

hyungwon: getting into bed at 2:30pm is this semester’s mood i guess

jooheon: *almost cried because someone knocked on my door while i was asleep and it scared me*

changkyun: bad news guys, ive been diagnosed with headass

  • Hyungwon: Bitch.
  • Wonho: Blocked.
  • Hyungwon: Wait, unblock me, I need to tell you something.
  • Wonho: Unblocked.
  • Hyungwon: Bitch.

Jooheon, holding the door open for Minhyuk: After you.

Minhyuk: No, after you.

Jooheon: No, I insist! After-

Kihyun, pushing past both of them: After me!

Kihyun: and now, here’s Minhyuk with the cute ending

Minhyuk, covered in blood and holding a knife: I thought you said cult ending

minhyuk: the guy i wanna date

*shows picture of jooheon*

minhyuk: vs the guy that wants to date me

*shows picture of kihyun*

kihyun:

minhyuk:

kihyun: who the fuck said i wanted to date you?

Shownu: *choking*

Changkyun: Help I need to call 911 but the 9 button isnt working!

Minhyuk: Just turn it upside down and use the 6!

Changkyun: Genius!

Shownu: *stops choking*

Shownu: What the fuck.

Kihyun: Wait, be quiet.

Minhyuk: Did you hear something?

Kihyun: No, I just wanted you to be quiet.

minhyuk: who’s the sun

wonho: monbebes

minhyuk: whO Is tHe suN

shownu: we’re all beautiful

minhyuk: WHO IS THE SUN

changkyun: I-

minhyuk: ME. I’M THE SUN

Minhyuk: That was impulsive. You probably shouldn’t have done that.

Minhyuk to Minhyuk: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Wonho: I guess we’re adults. The question is, when did that happen, and how do we make it stop?

Kihyun: Am I right, Hyungwon?

Hyungwon: I’m almost certain you’re not, but to be honest, I wasn’t listening.

Hyungwon: look, you seem very nice

Wonho: thanks

Hyungwon: I have no room in my life for people like that

  • wonho: oh, come on, i wasn't THAT drunk.
  • minhuk: you kept on flirting with kihyun.
  • wonho: so? he's my boyfriend.
  • minhyuk: you asked him if he was single and started crying when he told you no...
  • minhyuk: i lo-
  • monsta x: yes, you love jooheon, we know, you love jooheon so much, he's the light of your life, you love him so much, you just love jooheon, WE KNOW, you love jooheon, you fucking love jooheon, okay we know, we get it, YOU LOVE JOOHEON. WE GET IT.