Posts on Twitter:

Texas drug suspects called cops after somebody stole their weed, police say with your 👇Click on link below for story👇

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Practicing law with she-devil Cooper Bach ain't easy. Snarky cocktail of wicked litigants and psychotic partners with a romance chaser. -- The Law Firm of Psycho & Satan --

Let's stop mincing words. Donald Trump is a traitor. He is killing our democracy. He needs to be stopped and stopped now. Impeach, prosecute and imprison. Now!

If you are a in the midst of applying for funding this may be tooo close to reality to be funny 😬 but we just couldn’t help ourselves 😂 😆

VOLVIIIII >:'DD, espero que no se hayan olvidado de mi, sigueme para mas momazos ;v/

CAT, Common Admission Test, is required before admission to the University‼️ 🐶📑🐶

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anonymous asked:

I’ve been trying to find this fic where eren and mike are trainers and Levi and Erwin have been pinning over them and like one day eren and mike use a bath bomb and it’s all glittery and basically I think the fic was called bomb something but i can’t remember !! I don’t know if the author deleted it or

Hey Anon! 
I’m soooo happy you asked for this! I’ve never read it before and omg it was amazing! Please go drop a sex bomb in your tub and read away! 

sex bomb by cottontale
(Rating E, words 13317, multichapter, complete) 

Eren was covered in glitter and smelled like lavender. God, he loved bath bombs.

Highschool Out of Context

One of my favorite things about highschool is walking don the hall and hearing fragments of conversations completely out of context. Here are two things I heard today.

I was walking past a group of Junior girls today and one of them said: “Oh honey, I make bank off of sucking people’s dick.”

Two Freshmen:

Freshman 1: Wait, what was I talking about again?

Freshman 2: Uhh…HomoJesus.

Freshman 1: Oh yeah, that’s right.