3/23/19 — “I know it can be tricky, but I’ll be there to catch you. And you’ll find your baby, you don’t need to worry ‘cause one day you’ll find home.”
Home ownership. Sometimes I feel it’s a blessing, and other days a complete nightmare. On good days, you sit back after you spent hours deep cleaning and feel so blessed that it’s YOURS. You come home to your things, your comfort, your hideaway. You can do whatever you want and no one will tell you ‘no’. Then you have days where your roof is leaking, your heat doesn’t work, fun things called taxes, your dryer doesn’t dry, and your dishwasher flood; and you need to rely on YOU because you don’t have a landlord to come and fix anything.
I was thinking a lot about this because we are coming up to our one year house-iversary. –
We I put a lot of blood, sweat and tears into this home. The before and afters are pretty remarkable if I do say so myself. [Maybe I’ll post those at some point] It’s just a huge responsibility. It’s definitely not as easy as it’s made out to look in TV shows and movies, and it’s certainly not like renting / apartment living. I never really relied on my parents when I got older. Not only did they have the financial ability to support me, but I also needed to escape that environment. I learned you need to work for what you want, and work hard.
I always wanted to own my own home. It’s definitely an accomplishment, and I hate to sound petty and not grateful, because I absolutely am. It’s just hard. I know there were countless nights in my past where it would keep my up at night wondering “Will I ever fall in love?” “Will I ever live with someone?” “Will I ever get married and own a home?” No one can answer those questions right now, but I can tell you … it’s worth the wait. Don’t rush it. Don’t dwell on it. When it happens, it will feel that much better, even if your dishwasher smokes when you use it :) One day you’ll find home.