based on a support conversation where Walmart picks up Robin to help with the books
Berdly: Hey, Noelle! Just wanted to ask if-
Susie: GODZILLA NOISE.
Berdly: AAAAAAAAAHHH!!! GET YOUR FUCKING GIRL, BITCH!
Noelle, a box of candy canes on her head: She don’t bite.
Berdly: YES SHE FUCKING DO! GET-!!!
Cassandra: *in a tuxedo*
Elsa: *in a red evening dress*
Cassandra: You’re so beautiful 😍
Elsa: Thank you 🥰
Cassandra: May I?
Elsa: Yes
Cassandra: *lifts her onto the piano*
Elsa: *lies back, gazing longingly*
Cassandra: *nuzzles her and brushes hands all over her body*
Elsa: *softly moaning*
A voice in the wardrobe whispers: Now kiss!
Elsa: GODDAMMIT ANNA!!!
anonymous asked:
Did Beck reach her kinkiest before, during, or after her relationship with Harper?
“I literally cannot win with this question. I can’t say before because we started dating at like, fourteen. If I say during then she’s gonna take all the credit for any sexual prowess I have. And if I say after then that implies I had to bump up the kinkiest because no one compares…”
“It was definitely during.”
“… She’s not wrong.”
anonymous asked:
it's good though, very good
“I do my best to please.”
⌈◄ ⌋ “ Wow! Daddy looks pretty~ I wanna wear a dress too~ ”
“no come over here… we’re sofa apart.”
Rudy: Alright, tell me how you feel about Susie.
Noelle: I wanna kiss her!
Rudy: Okay, now how do you feel about Kris?
Noelle: I wanna kiss them, too!
Rudy: So you have two crushes?
Noelle: What? No! Susie is my crush, Kris is my best friend!
Rudy: … but you said you wanted to kiss them too?
Noelle: Well, yeah, but like in a friendly way.
Rudy: Oh, so like on the cheek or forehead?
Noelle: I mean, that too, but also passionately on the lips.
Rudy: … like you wanna kiss Susie?
Noelle: Yes! Exactly like I wanna kiss Susie! But like, as friends. Don’t know what’s so difficult to understand about this.
Rudy, holding his face in his hands: Oh my god.
This crackfic demonstrates one of the reasons why I didn’t end up going to a good college back in the day.
Marinette’s first time out as Ladybug didn’t really go the way she had hoped it would. The Akuma fluttered away uncaptured, the streets were filled with Stonehearts waiting to be activated, and she trod unhappily up the steps of her school ready to hand over the earrings to someone more deserving.
But Alya pulls her aside before she can get to class, with more important news. In reviewing her amateur cameraphone footage of the first fight with Stoneheart, she realized something startling. How will Marinette and Adrien react when it turns out that much more than they’d expected had been… exposed?
First Times Are Always Awkward on FFN
First Times Are Always Awkward on AO3
A teaser:
Alya wrapped her arms around her new friend, consolingly. “Marinette, no one else has seen this. I haven’t shared it with anyone, and I don’t intend to! But you had to see it before I erased it, or you’d never believe me,” she said.
“I don’t… I don’t… Why am I naked in that video, Alya? You saw me there! I was fully clothed and masked the whole time! I know I was!” Marinette panted.
“I know you were! I saw you with my own eyes!” agreed Alya. “You and Chat Noir were costumed from head to toe. I’d hardly believe that you were some kind of super-acrobat if you were just you, you know? But the camera… the camera says otherwise.”
“I don’t get this at all,” panicked Marinette. “Was this some kind of group hallucination? It can’t be. How could we all have had the same dream?” She shuddered, then came to a decision, and reached into her purse for the mysterious black box. “You know my secret now, anyway, so it’s not like this is blowing anything…” she added, putting in the earrings.
Alya stared at her, waiting for a change that didn’t immediately happen.
“Tikki…” Marinette said, “come out here, please. We need to talk, right now.”
A tiny voice in her purse replied, “Marinette, you know that other people aren’t supposed to know about -”
“Tikki… get your tiny red ass out here NOW.”
anonymous asked:
[α̲̲̅̅k̲̲̅̅α̲̲̅̅j̲̲̅̅j̲̲̅̅s̲̲̅̅j̲̲̅̅f̲̲̅̅j̲̲̅̅f̲̲̅̅j̲̲̅̅g̲̅]
Valid
Sand in Crack Rubber
“Being straight seems boring.”
//it’s like Audrey is a rpg sorcerer and maxed her INT, WID, then keeps crit-missing every DEX roll.
prompto rn:
Grande Angelito 
En 
