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This is a Masters Degree on Information and Library Science. You know what that includes? Masters level understanding of taxonomies, collation and categorisation of Information so that it is more easily accessible for research purposes.

You know what the university intraweb has done?

Put all the assignments and readings for the different classes in different places under different names with no centralised FUCKING system.

Enter me and my Autism Brain. Can I find anything? At all?

No.

The irony does not escape me.

I have Alexa remind me when to take my medications. The first reminder says, “This is a reminder, take your meds.” Thirty minuets later she says, “No really, take your fuckin’ meds.”

Alexa has a really hard time understanding me for some reason and she thought unsaid two words - fuk in. Because of her Australian accent (yes, our Alexa is Aussie) it sounds like she is swearing.

I absolutely love it. It helps keep me listening to her.

beastandbean  asked:

Can I get your opinion on something? I’m wanting to go back to school to work with autistic kiddos. My options are fairly limited due to various life circumstances, but I may have found a promising program today. It is a masters program with an emphasis on applied behavioral analysis. I’m familiar with ABA therapy and the response the practice has gotten from the autistic community. I don’t intend to work in ABA therapy, but is the practice of applied behavior analysis innately unethical? Or

Or does the unethical nature of the therapy lie in the principles and practices of therapists? As I’m typing this I feel like my initial disinterest in the program was probably well founded. I don’t want to study something with unethical and harmful beliefs as its basis. Anyways, I plan to do some research. However, I respect and appreciate what you do here and would really like to get your take on it.

Gosh this question… it is very good to me, as a blogger, as an autistic, and as a psychology and sociology student.

It is one of those things that no matter how you answer it, the answer will always be, “yes and no.” Is the practice inherently unethical? I believe so. Can a therapist actively work to undermine that to make it ethical? Yes. Can they do it without implicitly supporting ABA at some point? No. Doesn’t that make it inherently unethical? Of course.

That doesn’t mean it isn’t worth it if you use that knowledge to undermine abusive institutions and/or lead by example.

I have opinions about this, and while I am open to some day being proven wrong in my views, I have not read a good argument yet. Long answer below the cut.

Keep reading

Saw my therapist today. It was the first time I’ve seriously cried when speaking to her. I don’t know if that’s a breaking point and the start of something good, or if it was just an emotional day because I’ve missed my medication for a few days in a row. But I expressed my mind on a few things:

• Why I sought out therapy originally. Being in a bad place with my previous marriage, separation, filing for divorce, hitting rock bottom, my life turning upside down, moving, my new relationship, the future, losing myself, trying to move forward and not fall apart, my many undiagnosed symptoms, etc.

• What therapy ended up being. Me finding a therapist but it not working out. We didn’t click. My doctor referring me to a place for my assumed ASD. Them, after testing and diagnosing with autism, referring me to a trauma counselor based on their observations of my past. And therapy suddenly becoming about my trauma above all else.

• What I need from her as a counselor and what I am looking for. A counselor to listen. To whatever it is that I may need to talk about or work through on that given day. To know that me not speaking about trauma, is not me being elusive. I just, as Doctor S. said, have a complex situation. My mental and physical health is complicated and from a long history. I need her to work with me as I sort my life out. And understand that I want to prioritize my now. My future. Work on bettering how I’m feeling about everything going on now so that I can move forward in life. Some days I may need to talk about the things from my past, as they do exist, but when I’m ready. I’ve already told her I’m honest with her. I’m willing to be open. Work on being better at it.

• I want her as my therapist. Not someone else. She and I have good chemistry and I don’t see why I’d need to see anyone different. She expressed she never meant for me to think she felt differently. She just wanted to make sure I felt okay. That if my depression was not improving, it wasn’t because I wasn’t seeing the right person. But I’m human. My depression comes and goes like the wind. On an average day, I’m trying really hard to stay positive and focused. And come time to see someone, I want it to be her that I talk to. Wether I’m good, or having a long season of depression.

I shared quite a bit with her on a deeper and more emotional level, but that would take a lot to write about. But I felt good opening up to her about what I need from her and how I’m feeling. And she felt good about it because I was able to come in and be raw with her. I gave her some perspective. I told her that I know that I know everything about myself and I sometimes forget she can only know what I tell her. Which so far hasn’t been a lot. So that I have to give her something to work with. So I tried my best to give her the perspective where she needed so she could understand better. The session went by fast but I said what I needed and we both felt today was a huge success. I feel like I’ve lifted a huge weight off my chest that had been lingering the last two weeks.

So that’s that. I’m happy that I could show her I do have emotions underneath my skin. I’m always so numb to them when with her. It felt good, even though I kinda hate it, to just cry and express how I’m feeling deep down. It’s progress.

youtube

I did another Video on #social 1) Scripts/Rules/Masks 2)Withdrawn 3) Social hiding where in complex situations we withdraw of hide due to confusion.

This video is mostly on Social Hiding

Social hiding has nothing to do with being scared of the person or situation.  Instead it deals with confusion and lack of data.  In complex social situations where I am confused and/or have no scripts or not enough data I will if possible withdraw or hide.  For example service providers visiting your house.  I am not very good at knowing or having rules dealing with the situation so generally I hide because I am so confused.

A happy autistic thing

I just met a fellow autistic girl today!! She had more severe case of autism than me, but she was so happy and cute!! It was kinda hard for me to communicate with her bc she was mute and im not sure how to communicate with mute people, but she was smiling and laughing so i think we did have some sort of connection! I tried to give her a hug but she was shy! I hope i meet her again someday,,

@ allistics in fandom

We need to talk.

I’ve noticed some people tend to describe a fandom as “autistic” or “the fandom is so autistic” and other related terms to describe a militant and/or insufferable fanbase. This is harmful and portrays autistic people as undesirable. If you wish to be accepting of others, this is not the way to do it, and displays an ableist attitude.

Please stop using autism as a synonym for terrible.

Sincerly, an autistic person.

anonymous asked:

How can you tell the difference between positivity and perceived superiority? Because it’s really hard for me to tell the difference and on tumblr I’m pretty sure there’s a lot of both and I can rarely tell what their intentions are

That… is a really good question. I’m not entirely sure how to answer it.

I think an easy part of that is when someone else uses third person language to talk generally and specifically about something it is probably positivity.

For example, “You deserve happiness.” You in this case implies that you, the person reading the sentence, are deserving of happiness. But it also implies that anyone reading that sentence deserves happiness.

This applies to, “I” statements as well. “I deserve happiness.” Whosoever reads the sentence deserves happiness. But think this is also probably where it gets murky.

I can see how it would be really easy to see these “I” statements as superiority. Afterall, where is the line between healthy and positive versus unhealthy and superior?

It’s a question that applies to any coping tool, honestly. How much is too much? And I really can’t answer that because it is very subjective and different for each person. Sometimes it is very hard to figure out.

Are you reminding yourself? Are you excluding other people? These are clear lines. But somewhere in the middle they meet and… I don’t know where that is.

As for tumblr specifically I will say that @positiveautistic is a nice person. The positivity he spreads is heartfelt and genuine. I truly believe that any positivity you see on her blog is offered in good faith as a way to help other people.

I personally like Elina’s blog because it is so ephemeral. I see a post, it speaks to me, and next time I see their blog it is something different. I feel what I need to feel in the moment. And when it is a different moment? Well, there are other posts for other days.

anonymous asked:

I was diagnosed with assbergers but I hate the idea of routine. Like whenever I see myself doing things the way I’ve done them in the past I just feel horrible if I don’t change it. And this applies to everything from sense of identity to how I commute to places. Would that exclude me from being autistic because I’m pretty sure that’s a main criteria? I do fit a lot of the other traits though but I’m great at camouflaging so it might not count.

Routine is one example of one possible sets of traits in autism that happen to center around rigidity. They are not part of the primary criteria (that would be social-emotional reciprocity, criteria A).

Rigidity of any type is neither required, nor is it universal. It would not exclude you from a diagnosis in and of itself (it certainly didn’t exclude me) as long as you meet enough of the other trait categories under Criteria B in the DSM.

Consider, however, that an absolute insistence on avoiding routine is itself a form of rigidity. It may not be a routine, but you can certainly take it to levels that meet diagnostic threshold.

Whether that is the case here or not I can’t (and won’t) say, but it is certainly plausible.

I have had this huge impulse to make an orbees bath and literally nothing is holding me back except my lack of an extensive orbees supply.